March Sadness - Dealing With Depression

wHat is lovE mISsions

"LOVE GOD with all your heart,

and your neighbor as yourself."

The Torrans Tablet

My sweet eight month old baby has a depressed head.  So does his mama. Jonathan's is caused by developmental delays.  Mine is caused by life. In the last four years, our family has had CHRISTians betray us, health leave us, finances avoid us, 

and GOD try us :(  

You probably have had this happen, too.  

Living is hard.  I have talked to a woman who has a background in Biblical Counseling. She said these events caused shock, paranoia, fear, panic, anxiety, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, and discouragement. If you think you might be depressed, please see someone who can help you. The following are just a few things that are helping me:

1. Knowing Who I Am Not

I am not perfect, not even close, and do not want to pretend to be.  I am not always happy, hopeful, or helpful.  I do not know all the answers or even some of them. I try and I fail, and I am not able to get back up.  I am not, and that is okay.

2. Knowing Who I Am

I am in awe of the ONE WHO CALLS HIMSELF THE I AM. I am nothing compared with HIM. But I am created in HIS IMAGE. So I am beautiful.  I am a believer in HIS GRACE, though I do not often feel like it, which is why it is called grace.  

3. Knowing WHO HE IS 

HE knows I struggle with faith, and works, and mercy.  HE knows I question why people, especially children, have to suffer.  HE knows I hurt for the hurt of this world, and HE hurts more.  HE knows I am sinful, sad, scared, scarred and simple.  And HE loves me anyway. 

May HIS SON JESUS heal us all.

Yes, You - How You Saved A Life

wHat is lovE mISsions

"LOVE GOD with all your heart

and your neighbor as yourself."

The Torrans Tablet

You might not think you did anything. Yes, you did. You helped someone, several someones, who could not help themselves. This is how:

You Prayed

You asked the LORD to help us. We were helpless.  The only thing we knew: Someone is praying.

You Cared

You liked our prayer requests on Facebook to let us know you saw our hearts.  We reached out to family and friends. This is what we realized: People are here for us.

You Encouraged 

You commented with kind thoughts. We needed to know it would get better. You assured us: It will.

Thank you. The smallest things make the biggest difference.  You helped us remember that GOD has already saved us. And HE will hold on for dear life.

 Love, Joseph, Amy, Michael and Jonathan Torrans

Missionaries to the Homeless, Hurting, and Heartbroken

Like us.

Note: Joseph and Amy have had health problems. Their one year old and seven month old baby boys have developmental delays. This family has struggled over the last four years. As has everyone. Please keep praying for them. They are praying for you. 

More Ministry Matters:

Please pray for Evelyn.  She is a model whose husband left her for someone even younger and thinner. Now she is suicidal and needs JESUS.  

Not New - Why I Want To Be Old

wHat is lovE mISsions

"LOVE GOD with all your heart,

 and your neighbor as yourself."

This new year, I do not want to go forward. I want to go back.  Back to sweet tea and sweetie, yes sir and yes ma'm, and being married sixty years. Since I can not rewind time, I will pause it. And think about why I want to be old.

Old People Do Not Mind Being Called Old

They say it themselves. "I'm ninety if I'm a day." With a twinkle in their eye. Not like me trying to convince my four year old nephew that I am still young.

Old People Do Not Care What People Think

They know who they are and they like it.  People who are closing in on one hundred years do not waste time trying to make everybody happy.  They realize life is about being content.  Not like me worrying if I have accidentally offended someone.

Old People Care About Young People

They look fondly on children, teenagers, and young'uns like me.  They give advice because they have been there. Not like me forgetting to enjoy the moments my babies are babies. 

LORD willing, maybe I will live to see my great grand kids. But I can start living now with this perspective. Instead of being young and foolish. So Happy New Year! We are one step closer to being old and wise ;)  

  

The If Gift

wHat is lovE mISsions

"LOVE GOD with all your heart and your neighbor as yourself."

The Torrans Tablet

If we had not gotten this gift, our lives would never have been the same.  He was a baby, like CHRISTmas in my arms, but he had special needs.  Our six month old Michael could not hold his head up, scoot, sit, roll, or move very much.

If we had not gotten the surprise gift of his baby brother, his life would never have been the same.  He is a five month old, lifting up his head when he sees his big brother who is now seventeen months. Our hopefully normal Jonathan helps Michael understand how to be gentle, and how to love someone who is smaller than him.

If we give the GIFT of JESUS, lives will never be the same.  People will hold CHRISTmas in their hearts every day of the year.  Our mission is to help those who need it.

If you need something, please tell us.  If you can help others, please tell us. Your life will never be the same, 
if you take the GIFT.

Love, Joey, Amy, Mikey, and Jonny Torrans

Missionaries to the Homeless, 

Helpless, and Hopeless

More Ministry Matters:

You can also contact the Just Living Center, 815 East Platte, Colorado Springs, CO, 80903, 719-235-3257 if you need something!

Merry CHRISTmas :)

As Anger

wHat is lovE mISsions

"LOVE GOD with all your heart 

and your neighbor as yourself."

The Torrans Tablet

As a young girl, I did not often feel the emotion of anger.  I would avoid conflict, be sad, confused, cry, or get my feelings hurt. When life did not turn out like expected, I was mostly easy going or disappointed.

As a woman, wife and mother, I am surprised by little bursts of anger.  I still avoid conflict, but sometimes when I am tired, overwhelmed, rushed, or frustrated, I get startled by that feeling of madness.  When life does not turn out like I attempted, I realize I have just snapped at my sweet husband or lost patience with my beautiful babies.  

As I immediately regret it, I wonder where did that temper come from?  I am sorry, so why does it happen again?  When will I be able to handle hardships with peace in my heart? 

As a follower of CHRIST, I want to be slow to anger.  I want to get to the root of the problem, instead of feeling like a totally different person.  When I am weak, then HE is strong.

As CHRISTians, let us save our fury for what really matters.  I hate child trafficking, rape, murder, and the sin in my own soul.  When I use minor discrepancies as anger, I miss out on gracefulness, forgiveness and thankfulness.  But when I let a little bit of righteous indignation fuel justice, I can help change the world by finding a way to overcome evil.  And that feels like love.  

Person Prayer:

Please pray for Starla. She is a nineteen year old girl I have tried to help.  Her live in boyfriend raped a fifteen year old girl and is now in jail.  Both of these girls need JESUS.

Joy Boy

wHat is lovE mISsions

"LOVE GOD with all your heart, 

and your neighbor as yourself."

The Torrans Tablet

The joy in his face is like a mirror that never stops glowing. My fifteen month old beautiful baby boy Michael.  He is an inspiration to me.  And an example.

The joy in his eyes sparkles like a blue creek on a sunny day.  My own eyes, the same color, tend to resemble a muddy lake on a cloudy day.  He is happy. And I am sad.

The joy in his smile catches me off guard, like a rocket trying to tickle the moon.  My personality is cautiously glad when life is going well.  He is glad all the time.  And I wish I were.

The joy in his laugh is like a hundred yellow balloons appearing in the sky. My heart is worried that this world will be bad for my children. He reaches for his sweet three month old baby brother Jonathan's hand.  And even with special needs and physical therapy, my tiny son makes every moment better for everyone he sees :) 

Wishing you the joy of JESUS, too,

Joey, Amy, Mikey, and Jonny Torrans

Please contact us with your stories of joy and answers to prayer!

More Ministry Matters:

Please pray for Major. 

He is an eighteen year old homeless boy we have been trying to help.  Using drugs, getting drunk, and being violent have gotten him in trouble in the past.  This young man needs the joy that only GOD can give.  

Kneeds

wHat is lovE mISsions 

"LOVE GOD with all your heart and your neighbor as yourself."

The Torrans Tablet

When I was a child, I got down on my knees to pray.  When I became an adult, I lost some of that faith.  When I think about it, I think I miss that childhood belief. So I just tried it. So, yeah, I got down on my knees. So nervous, I felt.

Nervous about bowing before a Holy GOD.  Nervous about it having been so long.  And nervous about wanting to do it again. You see, I used to pour out my heart to JESUS about everything. You know, I started to wonder why HE let such bad things happen in this world. You too?

Now I find it easier to pray for others. Now I ask GOD to help you, and I mean it.  Now I want HIS Will, and am a little afraid to ask for mine. I have had enough of my prayers go wrong. I have seen what I wanted go up in smoke.  I have felt myself not be good enough to be bold before the one and only GOD.

But I have needs. I am trying to pray about them. I ask you to please do the same:

We need our cars to stay fixed and be safe for our babies to ride in.  Please pray they will not break down again when we are driving to doctor appointments, work, and in snowy weather.

We need money for medical bills, vehicles, and emergencies. Please pray that GOD will provide.

We need our tiny condo to sell so we can have room for our family of four. Please pray the right people will be prepared.

We need our one year old Michael to improve through physical therapy and our two month old Jonathan to grow healthy.  Please pray they will not have any more set backs.

Email me your "kneeds", and I will pray for them. And we will see our FATHER answer. And not because we are on our knees or not, but because HE understands the kneeds of our heart. 

Thank You from Joey, Amy, Mikey and Jonny Torrans.

Missionaries to the needy.

That is all of us.